Comfort

Today, Father has done nothing but amaze and remind me of how strong He is. How he can always comfort us in a time when he seems far away. I guess he is always doing this, the only thing keeping me from seeing it is...me. 

Paul and I finally broke down and bought Bethel's album "You Make Me Brave". I have been using youtube to listen to it for the longest time and finally decided to stop being a cheapo and buy it :) I was riding in the Jeep with the Caroline this morning and she says, "mama, can you play our song?" I asked her which she was referring to and she began to sing, "...through it all, through it all, my eyes are on you, through it all, through it all, it is well..." My heart jumped with joy. So I turned it on and as we sang together my heart filled with joy; and in that moment all the sadness seemed to cease. The next song came on, it is called "You make Me Brave" We have sang this in church several times recently and I knew I liked it; but today was different. I truly began listening to the lyrics and began praying this song over my life. 

The lyrics say this:

I stand before You now
The greatness of your renown
I have heard of the majesty and wonder of you
King of Heaven, in humility, I bow

As Your love, in wave after wave
Crashes over me, crashes over me
For You are for us
You are not against us
Champion of Heaven
You made a way for all to enter in

I have heard You calling my name
I have heard the song of love that You sing
So I will let You draw me out beyond the shore
Into Your grace
Your grace

You make me brave, you make me brave

You called me out beyond the shore into the waves

You make me brave, you make me brave

No fear can hinder now the love that made a way

*you can listen to the Brave,  here*

This song brought so much comfort into my life today. It brought a peace to my worried soul. God's got this, no matter what. No matter the outcome of this situation, he is in control 100%. 

We have family that came in town this weekend. My dad's mom, sister, brother, and his brother's girlfriend. We haven't seen them in so long and it was a great day spent laughing and just loving on one another. 

I was talking to my aunt about daddy and all that is going on and I said, "You know, God did a pretty good job in picking daddy to have this disease." She looks at me and says, "You are so right, I said the same thing. He couldn't have picked a better man, He always has an awesome plan." 

I truly believe that God can heal my daddy of this horrid disease. I also know that God ultimately gets the glory 100% and even if he chooses to not heal daddy he is going to do something amazing through this battle. 

I saw my dad laugh and enjoy himself more today than I have in a very long time. It was a nice break from the normal. Seeing him like this brought comfort also. Seeing daddy be able to just enjoy time with family and just breath was nice. 

Just a brief update:

Depression is a big side effect of PSP. It hits fiercely and quickly. So they had daddy on Zoloft. The Zoloft did nothing but make him sleep. He was awake maybe 4 hours a day, he wouldn't make eye contact or talk much. This was not working well for him. So they changed him to an antidepressant on the opposite end of the spectrum. I can't remember the name of it; I believe it starts with an "L". Anywho, this has done wonders. He has more energy, he makes eye contact and will talk with us. This is a true answer to prayers. The only thing I've noticed is that he doesn't want to eat much and he has thrown up a good bit in the past two days. We are not sure what is causing this to happen. I'm praying we can figure this out soon. 

Some scriptures I found today on comfort that I loved, and I hope the bless you as well:

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
(NIV)

Psalm 27:1
The LORD is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid? (NIV)